A few months back, as I was gisting with one of my classmates back in school, he informed me that the President of our fellowship would be getting married a few weeks from then. I was really happy for the guy. I thought to myself, “Na so my padi go turn daddy oo” He told me that the wedding would hold at a church not too far from my area. However, I was planning to travel that day so I didn’t even think twice about it.
Fast forward to the day before our President’s wedding and my colleague at work informed me that Oga had cancelled the trip we were supposed to go for. The next thing that came to my mind was how I would complete some articles I was writing for publication. Then, all of a sudden, I remembered the wedding. Hmm… I didn’t have to go. My President had called me and I told him I was going to travel so he wasn’t expecting me. What would I do now?
As I sat in the office, my mind went back to various Bible study sessions my friend took while we were in school. I also remembered the way he helped me when I was going through some tough times. There and then, I decided to go. But I didn’t want to inform my guys. I seriously like surprises. I like seeing the reaction on people’s faces. They will be like “How come? I thought…? But you said..?” things like that thrill me. Little did I know that I would be the one with the surprised face at the end of the day.
Early in the morning, I took out one of my “wedding natives” and then set out for the venue. As my folks had taught me, I decided not to go late. It was better if I sat there reading a book or something rather than getting there after they had done the joining. I got there a bit later than planned and there was a crowd already gathering. So I went into the church and found a nice spot where I could freely take pictures without having to tell someone “Squeeze me”
The usher gave me the program and as things happened, the name of the guy was the same as our President’s, and funny enough I didn’t know the lady’s name despite knowing her for so long. I knew her simply as Mummy G.O. The people around me greeted me. One Mama even smiled at me and said “Omo mi, bawo ni!! Eku orire o. Ire akari, tiyin na a de l’agbara Olorun.” I smiled sheepishly and said “Amin. Ese ma”. Little did I know that it was just normal Nigerian courtesy. If only I could turn back the hands of time…
As the husband walked in, I began to feel somehow. Even from the far place where I sat, it didn’t look like Presido o. Ah. Well, maybe he had grown chubbier, after all, it had been some years since I saw him. It was when the bride-to-be walked in that I got the biggest shock. It was not Mummy G.O oo! Even though the lady was using a veil, I knew she couldn’t be the one. Wahala dey! As I gasped unintentionally, the lady beside me asked me if there was any problem. I couldn’t bring myself to tell her that I was at the wrong branch of the church which happened to have the same name, so I looked her in the eyes and said, “My sister, It Is Well.”
Should I leave? Should I stay? I just remembered that there were two branches with the same name but the second one was on the other side of town and I couldn’t make it there again. I spoke to myself, “Ire, you have come this far, why don’t you just chill and enjoy yourself?” There and then, I decided to wait. I had already come this far, why shouldn’t I enjoy the rest of my experience. I participated fully. I danced well, almost as well as the groom. I sang along with the choir as they sang “You are married today, tomorrow no more…”
We proceeded to the reception and I sat in one nice corner. I smiled as the husband took the microphone from the MC and began to sing… “Iyawo mi, Ololufe mi, Ore mi, alayo mi, I will love you forever…” *blush alert*. The wife was just blushing. She was almost in tears but she had to protect the integrity of her make-up. As the event was coming to an end, I went to the couple and presented them with the gift I had bought for Presido. I could always get something for Presido later. Finally, I took pictures with the couple, their parents, and some of the guests. They all acted like I was an old-time friend. I smiled and said to myself “Nigerian Courtesy”.
That, my friends, was how I attended the wrong wedding and I enjoyed every single bit of it.
NB. This story is purely fictional. Well, not entirely, it actually happened in my head. All characters are fictional and any similarities to actual events or people is purely coincidental!